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Stare

by Cave Shine

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1.
Ascend 05:05
We See Who We Really Are On Days Like Today We Will Never Speak of It Again
2.
What will become of us A choking light in a shallow day? What will become of us Replacing wonder with decay Sometimes I wonder Do I sleep only when you're away Arising once I've left your grave I left a light there Now its gone Absorbed by the same God That took you from us I have a hard time looking past The hymns we used to sing And what they now really mean My eyes begin to ache at the thought of yours Yet I stare in search of nothing more And when I wonder off into the sky I notice it was all in your eyes Everything I used to want The dreams I left asleep The love I tried so hard to keep When you left, it was the first thing to leave I never really tried to keep it near me It will be the death of me
3.
My faith is broken My eyes swollen My hand aches from writing out your name Coughed into my buried lungs Are all his words that I've come to hate Contradictions in silver light Constant wonders at what you might Have to say if you were still here What would you say if you were still here? A year ago I knew who I was Years ago there was nothing here but love Drowning in the static of your aftermath I'm late to learn of every line I should not have crossed Would I still have lost you somewhere Above and Below? My ambitions bring everything I've ever loved Down to the ground Yea, you were better, yea you were wiser, but at the time You couldn't make a sound You tried to tell me in deep sleep But I was found to be obsolete Searching blindly through dying lands My starving heart found your strangled hands And we fell away
4.
We were carried along as children by the hand With the world far ahead of us And leaflets dancing behind As we grew so too did the world The clouds above deeper, and our bones more resilient With the passing winds A hurricane inside us Cascades of rainfall caressed our anxious hearts Yet just as the blankets were lifted Our eyes would open To see the sun no longer high above And our hopes no longer before us Our dreams went into hibernation As the bear in the cold Tucked away Hungry Two wandering spirits in a desolate pasture No eyes to guide us or wisdom to inspire The night called our names and buried them deep We listened close for the chance of aid With birds overhead the lightning sky set fire to midnight Our souls were saved We awoke to find Nothing ever changed at all
5.
Promises 04:21
When I arrive Will you remember what I look like? Or am I one to be ignored If I'm alright And there is still light outside Where is yours? Your home is far away As far as your touch from my hands Your voice distant Distant from my head I can't make it out But I live to try
6.
Leaflets 04:49
In hazel night I often feel The phantoms of your garden Dancing on my bones It weighs me down And carries me To slow lights Not with any wonder Or any word Should I see your eyes Without my own reflection Staring back Draining away at the rain Which held us in the ether Forevermore Should I see your eyes Without my own reflection?
7.
June 05:17
I'm past the point of your returning Stuck inside, forever yearning Never learning I fear this is the sum of me Seeing all our wishes bloom in black and white Too late and too soon The give and take of fleeting life and you ask me "What's worth fighting for?" "Always more" More days under shade with you More words I know are true More times I could realize I am the gleaming in your eye I would swim into the clouds to see you smile I would dive into the earth to gain a little while longer If only to see you smile again Just to gain a little while longer

about

'Stare' is an attempt at documenting and conveying the learned perspective of how dynamic loved ones can be in the face of true loss and how much change can take place as a result, for better or for worse. Not only does this release attempt to acknowledge and empathize with this mindset on an individual level, but my sincerest hope is that it resonates with someone else's experience in this matter. This material is an effort to get in bed with the notion that the very real gravity of losing someone close to you can be both beautiful and terrifying, as well as many other things. It is essentially meant to express the things we look to as a saving grace during such a period of loss, and how they may also spring into our lines of sight. Thank you for being a part of it.

credits

released November 10, 2017

Written and Produced by Taylor McClain
Additional Guitars by Joey Frost
Additional Vocals by Emily Kolakowski
Drums performed by Ben Mercer
Recording/Mixing/Mastering by Ben Mercer

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Cave Shine North Carolina

Born of Sideways Smiles

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